Tuesday, 1 December 2009
now i have been called many things in my life, some good some bad and some down right rude (though i may have deserved the latter in some cases), i have never though been accused of being completely insane. that is of course, until now! why you ask? well that is simple - i would rather go through labour than pregnancy any day of the week! - WHAT? i hear you shout! are you insane? there you are, you just called me insane didn't you? hah! i knew it! dont worry an explanation is forthcoming i promise.
i would say pregnancy and labour are like cooking. some people cook because they like to cook, i cook because i am hungry. that was what pregnancy was to me, a means to an end. don't get me wrong i love to mix the ingredients, if you know what i mean (nudge nudge, wink wink) but the actual cooking, the 'bun in the oven' if you will, does not interest me at all. did you see what i did there? bun in the oven, cooking, pregnancy. hehehehe, oh go on laugh, it was kind of funny.
anyway, a long painful labour? i think not! from start to finish my labour lasted just over 6 and a half hours, easy peasy squeezy! yes it hurt a bit but being high as a kite on gas and air meant that i really didn't care! now i may have been lucky and when and if russ and i have another one the world may be able to turn round, stick their tongues out and go hah hah haaaaaah 24 hours later and still no baby? now that's a labour!
on a serious note though i am absolutely terrified of having another baby! what if things don't go as smoothly this time? what if im in labour for days? what if something goes wrong? what if? what if? what if? now the sensible side of my brain tells me to shut up and stop being silly, but the female neurotic idiot side of my brain keeps on going. what if, what if, what if? is there an answer to this problem? will my memory fade? and will i go through my next pregnancy and labour with all the ease and expectations of the first? the problem is i will never know until i do it and by then it will be too late.
then suddenly, as i write this, i have come to a conclusion. the answer is staring me in the face! does it matter if things do not go as easily? of course not! it is for the same reason women who have had stressful labours decide to do it all again. im sitting here looking at my daughter snore peacefully in her chair and as i stare at my beautiful creation i know that another pregnancy, another labour, whether it is good or bad, i will do it all again because . . . and we can all say in unison . . . it is sooooooo worth it!